A LESSON IN (ROMANTICIZING) VIOLENCE
Reflections on the relationship with violence in the culture of metal
NPZ #2 — DECEMBER 2024 — PAGE 6
Metal and violence are inexplicably intertwined concepts. It’s evolved our form of dance, glorified and condemned in our songs, parts our markers of honor and pride, our mating call of sexual prowess. Maybe not that far.
Stories about the lifestyle of metalheads from the birth of the genre are steeped in blood, booze, and general craziness. The more wild the story, the more impressive. The higher you dive into the crowd with reckless abandon, the more you are cemented in the annals of headbanging history. The more gory the pit injury, the more normies you impress/intimidate when you go back to normal life. Violence and war are common subjects of songs, and tied to real world band/fan shenanigans. Exodus’s song “Bonded by Blood” mythos is legendary, with a story of people smashing glasses on the stage till it was slick with blood.
On the one hand, FUCK YEAH THAT’S METAL AS HELL!! On the other, how dangerous, what the hell??? And that’s another thing, we call things that are cool, crazy, dangerous, risky, edgy: “metal”. It’s a foundational pillar of the culture. Now, I’m not trying to discipline how we act in the scene, hell I was glorifying my own injury just a page turn back, but I’m just observing the interesting relationship the metal culture has with violence. And how that, in turn, has a relationship to the expectations of masculine behavior in the scene and society as whole.
I don’t think it’s surprising to say that I have a complicated relationship with masculinity. My identity, socialization, and even safety are tied to being accepted and seen as a man. I’ve developed a lot of idolization of “ideal” masculinity, and getting more into the scene, I would look at these metalhead guys, from now or in the past, and think to myself: “how can I be like them?” How can I look intimidating, unbothered, lean, full of life and empty of fear? How can I embody the “invincible male youth” energy they exude? I’m 5’4”, not super active, kind of socially anxious, and get buzzed off of one (1) beer. Does this make me less of a guy? Or less of a metalhead?
FOMO = Fear of Moshing Out.
It took me a while to build up to getting in the pit. I would watch with awe as people—guys 9 times out of 10, but surprisingly more fem people esp. at punk shows—threw themselves into the pit so un-self-consciously. I didn’t have that kind of fearlessness. What if I fell? What if I got hurt? What if I looked dumb? (that last one still TBH so I usually don’t get in first). My first desire to really be in one was Metallica in LA, up in the balcony watching the pits below. My first pit was during a Creeping Death cover, and I was with my friend for moral support. I got yanked into the Warbringer “Remain Violent” pit by a guy I knew as I was contemplating getting in. It gets a little easier each time, but there’s still that initial fears that usually hold me back; I feel a little more comfortable if it’s a song I know, I’ve gone my hardest during the Metallica tribute Damage Inc. (pg. 17) and Slipknot’s “Only One”, because I know what to expect from the rhythm of the song.
Mosh etiquette is great, and definitely helps with getting over those fears. We’re all there for a good time, we all pick each other up when we fall, we don’t look down on moshers of all creeds, even if they’re alone (unless they’re being a dick). I think we definitely grant a lot of honor to those who do get in the pits, the walls of death, the crowd surfs and dives. It’s a core part of the culture, and a metal show would feel incomplete without it. I won’t even get into crowd killing, that has been it’s own site of controversial discourse recently.
I think it’s valid to not want to get into the pit, look at people who are disabled, older, or simply not interested. They shouldn’t be any less accepted in the scene or less welcome at the show. Metal is not only about anger and physicality, but so many use it as a way to soothe their inner conflicts, and find calm; so why should they be excluded from shows? Not to mention how women experience shows differently from men (that’s for a future issue).
I do think it’s important to deconstruct unhealthy, even toxic ideas of what masculinity and what being a man means and looks like, and through that, what it is to be “in” the metal scene. Part of it is also deconstructing the idea of “weakness” as being tied to physicality, gender, or identity. Instead, maybe we can see “weakness” as those who disparage others to appease their own selfishness or insecurity, or who abuse their powers against others with less. Strength is in community, not in turning against the downtrodden.
But what do I know? I say keep moshing, keep having fun, but don’t fuck up anyone else’s time at the show. Have a drink if you want, but recognize and understand the struggle of substance abuse. Stay metal as fuck, and/by being a good person.
